Finished up work on Fri 13 April and was due 2 May 2018. On the second day of parental leave at approx. 11:45pm right when we were settling into sleep for the night, I felt a trickle of warm water come out down there. I went to the toilet and more water came out. This was followed by a poo (body gets rid of poo prior to labour as preparation) and lots of shivering. Called the hospital and was told to come in.

As we went to the hospital, more and more fluid came out (luckily the hospital had spare pads). As we went through the public system, we had to wait quite a few hours for the doctor. She said they needed to check if my water really had broken and used a speculum (what they use for a pap smear test) to open me up. Straight away, she confirmed it definitely was my water which had broken. There were then 2 options: wait for labour to happen in the next 24 hours or be induced on Thursday 19 April if natural labour hadn’t commenced (given water had broken, risk of infection if he wasn’t born within 24 hours).

This freaked me out because he was 2 weeks early and we hadn’t expected him to arrive so quickly especially given it was my first pregnancy. Drove home and I lay in bed to get some sleep (got home around 7am). At the hospital, I started experiencing mild contractions, which were approx. 10 minutes apart – felt like period pain.

In bed, kept waking up to the contractions which then become every 5 min – it started feeling like more intense period pain, but was still manageable. Tried to take each contraction one at a time and during it breathe, close my eyes and imagine my body opening. I put trust in my body to do what it needed to do and didn’t ‘hold back’ on the feeling during each contraction.

Got to approx. 1pm and the contractions were closer together (every 3 min) and I felt a more intense fire-like burning in my pelvis – each contraction felt like my body was stretching open and this feeling spread to my hips. Called the hospital, but the midwife said I was likely to be in pre-labour.

Around 2pm contractions were becoming unbearable and I felt more of a pressure in my pelvis. Called hospital again and mid-wife could hear me going through my contractions. She said I could come into the hospital, but if I wasn’t dilated enough, they would send me home. I was like wtf if this is pre-labour contractions, I need drugs stat.

Managed to painfully get to hospital at around 3pm and walked into the birthing room. The contractions felt like they were every 1.5 minutes – rather than a feeling of opening in my pelvis, I now felt an extreme pressure – similar to needing to poo (but much more intensified) but at the front rather than at the back of me. Midwife finally came in and checked how dilated I was – she was surprised that I was fully dilated which meant it was time to push (hence why I felt the need to).

From around 3:15/20pm to 4:03pm, this was pushing with contractions every minute. It was painful in that there was massive pressure each time and midwife Rachel was getting me to push about 3 times. Fortunately the body knows exactly what to do and I would get about a 30 sec rest in between where there was no feeling of pressure. Towards the end, I got a local anaesthetic in my vagina so Rachel could make a small snip in me to help the baby come out. I then felt a stinging pain (like if you pushed the sides of your mouth out wide) which would have been his head coming out. After his head came out, I could feel his body in me and with one final push he fully came out. He was then placed on my chest to start the bonding process and all the pain instantly went away.

I didn’t cry, only felt immense relief – it was so interesting how once he was out of me, the pain went away immediately. He was blue and covered in blood and other vaginal goodness. He was warm and it felt a bit like having a stranger on me i.e. I didn’t bond with him straight away.

Midwife then gave me an injection to help deliver the placenta – this brought on another contraction, but not as bad and it plopped out. A doctor then came in to stitch me up which wasn’t too bad – the only really painful part was a portion of the vagina didn’t have anaesthetic but it just felt like a stinging pain (I think the pain of childbirth outweighed any subsequent pain).

My labour technically was 3 hours (from when the contractions started getting intense) so it was so quick. Thinking back, if I had walked around during the contractions, it would have probably been quicker! Midwife said if I have kids again, it would likely be quicker. There was no time for drugs, so I’d managed to have a drug-free, natural vaginal delivery – I’m glad I got to experience it this way because it showed me that if I can push a human out of a tiny orifice in my body, I can do anything.

I attribute this more positive experience to keeping active during pregnancy mostly from doing yoga and other strengthening exercises (including pelvic floor). Also trying to be relaxed and have a flexible mindset to the overall process definitely helps.

Mama tales: c-section labour

This blog was set-up to share my personal experiences & learnings with fellow new parents. However, I remember one of the biggest challenges/fears I had whilst pregnant was labour. I freaked out during my third trimester because shit got real and I knew that sooner or later, the baby was going to come out. For me, the scariest thing about labour was that you have no clue how it’s going to happen, how it will feel and how the heck you’re going to deal with it. Hence why I shared my labour story (see below).

One thing I’ve learned though is that everyone has their own unique labour story. What would have been helpful for me was understanding more about different labour ‘scenarios’ as it would at least give me some idea of what it would be like.

So I’ve reached out to some lovely fellow mamas who have kindly agreed to share their labour stories and lessons with you. So here goes for the first one…

In 2017, I underwent an open uterine myomectomy to remove a 5cm fibroid that had distorted the lining of my uterus, making it difficult for conception. This meant that any children I had would need to be delivered via caesarean as the scar from the surgery could rupture during labour, putting myself and the baby at risk. It was a tough decision to make.

At the time, we had been unable to conceive for 16 months – after 5 months post recovery from the surgery, we were finally pregnant.

We decided to go to the Mercy Hospital for our prenatal care. I had a letter from my surgeon recommending a caesarean only delivery, to which they assigned us to obstetrician-guided care. Having worked in a public hospital and been in operating theatres, the surgery was very straight-forward for me. For my partner, it was unsettling. I think the thought of surgery increasing the risk of complications and death was never far from his mind. I tried to get him to watch videos of c-section surgeries to ease his mind. It did not. But reassuring him and remaining calm helped. Getting him to feel the baby turn at night and talk to my belly made the lead up more exciting as well.

The day finally arrived. All team members for the surgery were introduced to us and any questions we had were answered. A spinal injection was given in the operating room – I laid on the table and had the screen put up from the chest down after they confirmed I was numb from the nipple down. My partner sat beside me. The anaesthetic nurse asked us if we would like her to take photos for us with our phone and we gladly gave our phone to her. The anaesthetist kept us informed on what was happening behind the screen including the ‘pushing around’ when getting the baby out.

Then when it was almost time, the obstetrician got me to hold my breath and bare down while they were pushing down onto my abdomen. Suddenly there was crying, the screen was dropped down and the obstetrician got my partner to announce the sex of the baby as they held her to face us. After she was wiped down, she was given to me for skin to skin contact. She was then taken to the examination table for review and my partner cut the umbilical cord – I was able to watch this whilst being stitched up as there was a camera over the table.

Immediately post surgery, being with my baby was a joy. I fell in love again. Didn’t realise how little newborns were until she was born. I held her all the way from the operating theatre, recovery and to our room. We had difficulty with latching due to her mild tongue tie and my flattish nipple which made it hard for her to feed. So for her first feeds, we hand expressed and filled colostrum in syringes like mad to the point where my nipples were bruised. Then I hired the breast pump to mimic the baby sucking to get the milk coming through. Doing this every 3 hours was mental because we were scrambling to make sure there was enough before she cracked it. The hardest part was at night when my partner had to leave at 8pm – I was on my own with a caesarean scar to manage and a crying baby to settle. I was in hospital for 3 nights alone with 3 hourly prompts from the nurse and hand expressing colostrum to be collected into a syringe to feed her. When it got too much, I gave consent to give formula as getting up from bed started to cause pain at the wound and I needed to rest. In the end, we were referred to a lactation consultant who introduced us to using a nipple shield that shaped my nipple, which helped her suckle.

Taking her home was great. It was so nice to be in my own bed with all my own creature comforts. With the added bonus of family to help and friends visiting, I felt more human. It took time for people to realise that I needed help around the house because I looked so well (I was moving around quite freely). When my dressing was reviewed by the nurse, it revealed a hole in my wound. She attributed it to my movements as she saw me lean over the table and reach for something. She told me to let people help me and stop doing things like housework and lifting anything heavier than the baby. The wound took 2 months to heal and involved 2 hospital visits because it looked and smelled weird but luckily didn’t get infected.

It was tough adjusting to the 3 hourly feeds, but we had the help of my parents in the first week who came over to watch her from 10pm while my husband and I slept for a few hours. When we woke up, they would leave and return home. We eventually got used to the routine, but we also gave her formula at midnight to keep her full so we got more sleep. The formula settled her tummy and made her sleep longer too! My partner took 4 weeks off from work to help and provide support.

Lessons learned:

• Ask for help often, especially after a caesarean. By pushing myself, I hindered my own recovery. I am grateful for my parents and their support during those rough early weeks and even today.
• I learnt to surrender control and to do what I needed to do to survive. Let someone take over when you are at your wits end and do what works for you and your bub
• Cut yourself some slack, it’s ok to bend/break the rules as long as bub is happy and healthy
• Try not to take everyone’s advice, pick the ones you’re comfortable with. Remember, doing our best is good enough!

Mama labour tales: posterior Bub, epidural & private health care

To further highlight how unique each of our labour stories are, here’s one involving a posterior baby, getting an epidural and going through the private health care system. Thank you to my fellow mama friend for sharing – she also learned that having no expectations and going with the flow is the best preparation you can do for labour:

When I was first pregnant, labour seemed so far away and I was reluctant to give it much thought. I always imagined that it was would painful yet somehow, I would not beg for an epidural because my body would know what to do and I could always just relax. My mum had my sister at the age of 40 and she didn’t get an epidural so maybe I had the genes too. Pre-pregnancy, I was fit and healthy, having run a marathon and whilst pregnant, kept up with 4 hours of intense exercise a week (this included running up to 24 weeks, swimming, spin classes and yoga/weights). I thought surely, labour would be fine.

My husband and I decided to go to through the private health system – this was more for my hubby who is prone to worrying and thus seeing the same OB would give us some comfort.

I was 40 weeks pregnant and was getting pretty sick of being pregnant. Having been on maternity leave for 2 weeks, I was starting to get bored. The constant need to go to the bathroom, the slowness in my pace and seeing my weight go up and up was not glamorous.

We had a stretch and sweep (also known as membrane sweep) and decided that if this didn’t induce labour, I would get induced at 40+5 days. Our OB was very flexible and was willing to do whatever suited us. We were told that the baby’s position was posterior and I would need to try and make her move around by going onto 4 limbs like crawling or bouncing on a yoga ball.

That night, I developed cramps from around 8pm and was on and off. By the time, we went to bed, I had barely slept 10 mins when the pain intensified and being cautious, I started to time its occurrence. By 1am, they were about 10 mins apart and barely lasting a minute. Knowing that we could call the birthing suite at any time, we gave them a call and was reassured this was probably pre-labour and to see how we go. By 2am, the pain was about 5-6 minutes apart and we gave the birthing suite another call. While they were not worried, they suggested we come in.

At this stage, my husband and I were pretty excited and rushed to hospital at 4am. The suite was luckily quite empty and we were told we could go directly into a delivery suite. My OB didn’t start work until 9am and while she did have a backup, the midwives felt that it would be fine to wait for her. As the pain intensified, they suggested I try the gas. By now, the pain had reached my back – like cramps in your spine. We waited and waited until 9am, which seemed like forever. Finally, at 10:15am, we heard from our OB. Apparently, there was a miscommunication between the midwives and the OB and she thought we had gone home! By this stage, I had hardly slept and was willing to get drugged up and force our bub out!

When I was finally internally examined, I was told I was only 2cm dilated!!! But the pain I’d experienced was all pain and no gain as baby was still posterior and this meant a long and painful pre-labour period. Without hesitation, I asked the OB if I could be induced and luckily the birthing suite had room that day. Around 11am, I was ready for an epidural just so I could get some rest.

I had always been frightened by the epidural because of the thought that the needle needed to be in my spine, but the pain I was going through mixed with exhaustion outweighed that fear. It was a fairly short procedure, around 15 mins. I didn’t dare look at the needle and was trying to be as still as I could whilst praying I wouldn’t get a contraction at the time of insertion.

About 15 mins after the epidural, the anaesthetist tested my lower part of my abdomen and legs with ice. The sensation was weird, I could not feel the ice but knew that it was on me. My legs constantly felt like they had pins and needles. The pain pretty much went away straight afterwards and I was able to rest and sleep (although they seemed to be in 20 mins intervals). By 2pm, in 3 hours, I had dilated to 7cm and by 5pm, I was fully dilated and Bub was starting to turn her body around! Hooray!  We were told that I could start pushing in an hour or so.

By 4:45pm, I started to push. At that time, according to the midwife and my husband, they could already see Bub’s head which was covered in lots and lots of black hair. While I pushed as hard as I could (like taking a big number 2), it seemed that Bub’s head was not staying out. By 5:15pm, our OB grew concerned about her heart rate and decided that forceps would be required (the vacuum would not work as she had too much hair). It was amazing to see the two metal clamps pull out my baby and it was only after Bub was placed on my chest that I realised my OB had also performed an episiotomy, a small cut.

Bub was perfect and gave me a surprise present right away (her poo poo!). I was then told that I would be getting another injection so I could push out the placenta.  My husband tells me that he couldn’t watch that part as there was too much blood. I had lost around 700ml, more than the usual amount.

As much as I loved having Bub on my chest, I felt pure exhaustion. I think I was on the verge of passing out every few minutes and my eyes were so heavy that I couldn’t keep them open. I felt a gush of guilt as I wanted to be alert to study my little one, but my body just wouldn’t give.

Being in a private hospital, we moved to our postnatal ward, which was completely private and we had our own bathroom. It was cosy and the food was plentiful. On the 3^rd day, as part of the private package, we moved into a hotel room, which was spacious and luxurious. We had room service and midwives on call. The only thing the hotel didn’t have was an overnight nursery, but to us, it didn’t make a difference.

Lesson learned

When I think back to my labour experience, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. Sure, we can all hope for the perfect labour (whatever that might be), but for me, keeping an open mind was probably the best preparation I could do for labour. At the end of the day, having a healthy baby and a healthy mum is all that matters.

Mama labour tales: induced + emergency c-section

One of the things I always harp on about re labour is that you never know what can happen – throw out your birth plans ladies because having certain expectations can lead to disappointment and a negative birth experience. We’re so fortunate that we have access to great medical care so my best labour advice is to go with the flow, trust your body and be in the present moment taking each step at a time.

Below is a labour story from a friend who had some very unexpected things happen during labour. She has been kind enough to share to highlight how each woman’s labour is unique and anything could happen so just go with the flow:

From a young age I always knew I wanted kids. I loved spending time and playing with my nieces and nephew, but had never put much thought into the journey of being pregnant nor labour! 

As my partner and I discussed trying for a baby I felt a weird conundrum. My mind was questioning if I was ready for a baby, what will I do about work, will I still get to see my friends? It was something I always wanted, yet I wasn’t sure if I was ready. Then again, I’m not sure if people ever really feel ‘ready’.

We decided to start ‘trying’ as some friend had told us it would likely take some time. So we figured we had at least 6 months up our sleeve. We fell pregnant in the first month. My husband was ecstatic. I cried. I cried because we were about to go on a 6 week European holiday and I wasn’t going to be able to eat jamon and tapas. 

My pregnancy was relatively textbook. I spent most of the first trimester like a bear in hibernation. I felt so tired. There were many nights where I would come home from work and go straight to bed. My husband would always warn me by saying ‘if you sleep this much now you won’t be able to sleep tonight’ – but I showed him! I continued my usual exercise routine of reformer Pilates until the 3rd trimester where I switched to prenatal Pilates. 

Throughout my pregnancy I wasn’t really worried about labour. I always felt that it would all be ok. I took a Lamaze class which I found really helpful as they covered labour in detail, the types of pain management options, breastfeeding and baby first aid. I left feeling well equipped.

I received a tip to start expressing colostrum (if possible) after 37 weeks and collect it in syringes. I took the advice and by the time I went into labour I had about dozen syringes in the freezer ready to go with us to the hospital.

My birth plan was quite visual with lots of pictures and minimal writing. It essentially consisted of – natural labour, minimal intervention, skin to skin and delayed cord clamping. It was my ideal case, I but accepted that it was just a guide and things may not play out this way on the day.

The day I went into labour, my water broke around 2am. I had rolled over in bed and felt a very gentle pop. I didn’t think much of it at first but then thought I’d check and waddled off to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet and experienced a gush of fluid. It was slightly pink in colour so I woke up my husband and called the hospital.

Earlier in the month I had tested positive to strep b so I knew I had to go into hospital for antibiotics. What I didn’t know was that once I stepped in the hospital the doctor would immediately starting talking about inducing me. They said it was ‘safer for me to be induced because of my positive test to strep b’. I really wanted my labour to progress naturally so delayed being induced. After 4 hours at the hospital and one stretch and sweep later, I wasn’t feeling any contractions so finally agreed to being induced. 

Everything seemed to be progressing well and I was receiving increased doses of oxytocin. As the contractions intensified I used gas to help take the edge off the pain.

The doctor came into the room and mentioned that the external monitor was detecting a low heart rate and they would like to attach a small internal monitor to the babies head. They attached the monitor and the doctor said I was 4 – 5cm dilated. They were still detecting a low reading so immediately attached a second monitor. In just those few minutes I had dilated to 7cm.

I don’t recall this, but my husband said they then gave me 2 injections in the leg. They were trying to slow down the labour as it was progressing too quickly. The injections didn’t work and after a few moments I heard the doctor call out some code and quickly explained that I was going in for an emergency caesarean. I didn’t have a choice. Suddenly the room was full of people unplugging cables from walls and moving the bed to theatre. I remember the midwife trying to pry away the precious gas from my hands as the machine was connected to the labour room wall. I had a few contractions with no pain relief and I remember thinking – holy shit, this f*cking hurts. I don’t care what you do just get it over with. 

They wheeled me into theatre and the minutes felt like forever. The anaesthetist introduced himself to me, but honestly, my care factor was zero. They didn’t have time to give me an epidural so instead they knocked me out completely under general anaesthetic and delivered the baby.

I woke up in recovery, shaking uncontrollably because I felt so cold. They had placed heated blankets on me and said everything went well and baby was with dad. After a little while, I was finally moved to the maternity ward and got to hold my baby for the first time. 

Because I was in recovery I didn’t get the chance to have skin on skin immediately nor did I get to feed straight away. But I took comfort in knowing the baby didn’t go hungry because of the syringes of colostrum I had in the freezer.

Lesson learnt:
The way my labour progressed was completely unexpected, but I am ok with that. I went with the flow and still had a happy healthy baby in the end so that is all that matters.