Recently over the Christmas/New Year period, I experienced a sad farewell to nighttime breastfeeding. This story will hopefully bring you some hope as an example of ‘natural’ weaning, but also some important lessons to keep in mind.

I’ve had a love/hate relationship with breastfeeding. At the start of my boobin’ journey, I found it super difficult to get the hang of it. But after weeks and months of persistence, pain, emotional breakdowns and a bout of mastitis, I got the hang of it!

Breast is best – this is the mantra that as a new mum is honed into you. The not so good things about it:

-Your boobs feel like they’re on loan to your baby and you’re a milk machine

-You’re restricted in having a night out and have to be there on call for your Bub

-Overnight feeds = exhaustion and interrupted sleep

-When Bub develops teeth….good luck

The good bits:

-You feel special – this is something only you can give to your child

-Helps to bond with your baby

-You are amazed by how your body aka YOU can grow a human from your own ‘fluids’- this stuff helps Bub grow and protects them from illness. Apparently when you’re sick, your body starts making antibodies that get passed to Bub to try and help them avoid getting sick. Amazing huh!

I weaned Bub off of daytime breastfeeds before going back to work when Bub was 9 months. But we’d stuck with nighttime feeds as it was easier to settle him. There were plenty of days when I’d pine for the day that Bub wouldn’t need the boob. I’d look up different ways to wean, but they seemed to involve too much sleep sacrifice and I was pretty used to and lazy to change to be honest. Then I joined this Facebook group about natural weaning and one of the mums reassured me that they will naturally grow out of it and usually happens after they are 18 months.

However, the 18 month mark came and went and there was no indication of Bub giving up boob. So I started looking for ‘natural’ ways of weaning and thought the best time to try would be over a 2 week break from work.

However, leading up to this, I started feeling sad and nervous. Was this the right decision? Would I be harming Bub’s development? Would it work?

It wasn’t until after Xmas eve when Bub chose to stay over at his grandparents (covered in my previous blog post), that I realised how attached I was to breastfeeding. I realised that it wasn’t so much Bub who wasn’t ready, it was me.

After 2 separate nights with grandparents, I stopped offering boob and instead sung his favourite songs over and over until he fell asleep. Initially he still wanted boob, but seemed happy to listen to my singing until he fell asleep. If he woke up overnight I would hold and pat him and after awhile he fell back asleep. Now he is able to go to sleep without too much singing. He does like to touch the boob before sleeping but he doesn’t seem to want it (I secretly offered to him recently but he refused!).

I was surprised how ‘easily’ he seemed to take to this change which showed me that he was ready. For me, it was like experiencing a breakup. I realised something that only I could provide to my son was no longer needed (brings tears to my eyes even now).

But the 2 biggest lessons I’d like to share with you from this are:

1. TREASURE where you are now. Those moments good and bad with Bub, they will pass and one day be no more. And you will definitely pine for just one last time (that Last Time poem is so true!). So where you can, be present in that moment, enjoy what it has to offer and feel grateful for that moment.

2. There is NO RULE/FORMULA to follow for this. If you’re not ready, don’t force it just to meet other people’s expectations or what other Bubs have done. Each child is beautifully unique and develops at different stages. Do what works best for you and your baby.

So farewell breastfeeding, thank you for the hard but rewarding lessons you’ve taught me along the journey. Now it’s time to move onto other ways of loving my child and I can’t wait to learn these lessons.